Profile #3:
this is shjon. it's pronounced shawn. when we got our bank cards the bank teller had a hell of a time trying to figure out how to pronounce his name just based on what it looks like. shjon's from portland oregon. he's crazy about koreans, and he'd love to get a korean girlfriend. i saw some koreans staring at him in the elevator. i think it's because he's 6'3, and western. they don't stare at me as much because i'm 5'6 and i have black hair and brown eyes.

shjon was the first western teacher i met when i came here. or as i affectionately refer to every foreigner, wiguk. i heard shjon can left 1000lbs. actually, i don't have a lot of anecdotes about shjon at the moment, so i need to make things up. and today is 'nice' day. i just decided that, so i can't say anything bad about anyone. ooo, here's something. shjon has a mac laptop, and his ipod is not compatible with my pc laptop.

shjon is telling me some new things to say about him. he played college football, he was in the marine corps, and other stuff. horray.

profile #2

This is michelle, she is the other half of the dynamic duo. michelle and Rebecca were friends back in Niagara falls, and they worked in Korea together last year. Michelle is generally the instigator that gets Rebecca to do the stupid things when they’re drunk. Michelle is like me in that she doesn’t know how to control her facial expressions all the time. It’s particularly funny when she runs into a bad smell, she starts doing kung fu moves on it. She’s also like me in that she’s a vegetarian too.

Michelle has an identical twin. However, they’re apparently quite different. It’s funny how it works out.

Michelle brought her dog, dexter, here to Korea. It’s a real brat that will not stop wrestling with you, and it likes smelling guy’s pants for some reason. Not the crotch, just a pant leg. The one time dexter got in the apartment hallway and he ran into someone’s room. The dude was apparently pissed off, but you really shouldn’t leave your door propped open in case a dog runs in.

Michelle really likes dill pickles.

so here's the setup,
i work with other teachers. and now i can introduce you with this crazy invention called the in-ter-net. and another invention called a kam-er-ra.
so i'll introduce one teacher at a time, starting with...

Rebecca


Rebecca sits right beside me. The Korean kids call her robocop. Actually, there are no kids around, so that's not true. Rebecca taught here in Korea last year. Her, and another teacher here have a lot of funny drunk stories. such as the time she put a chopstick down some tough dudes pants, and she had to hide in a restaurant kitchen from him for about an hour, or the time she rang a doorbell in italy at 4am and when went to run away she thought she could fly and she just jumped on the pavement pretending she was superman.

she's really funny. i can't get enough of how she says 'ya, i know'. i'm gonna record it. she's also the head foreign teacher here. and that's rebecca.

MARY CHRISTMAS!!!
(bad korean translation)

So i chilled with brayden christmas eve. i knew him from york, and he's teaching in korea too. this was our tree.


awesome.


you adopt friends quickly when you're in a foreign country. i adopted brayden's friends. we went to TGI friday's and i got a loaded baked potato. and i made sure there was no meat. and then they brought it out with bacon bits. and i sent it back. it's too bad korean's don't really understand vegetarianism. they scraped the bacon bits off, although there was clearly still bacon bits all around it. ugh.

and here's the best, on christmas day a bunch of us teachers were supposed to meet at a buffet for dinner. of course it was a seafood buffet. me and this other vegetarian teacher opted out.


christmas day in the morning was good though. i went for a really long walk, and it was amazing. there were speakers setup out front of a number of shops and they had dance music playing and girls dancing, and talking into microphones advertising for the store. and i found it hard to keep the smile from my face. it was so funny. and i decided at one point to buy a bunch of socks and candy to give to the other teachers as stockings. i figured it would be a nice gesture, especially considering that we're all far from family.

and that was my christmas.


oh, and here's the extent of the graffitti i've found in korea.

i'd just like to take a break from korea for a moment and say that this was one of the funniest bathroom writing conversations i saw. it was at york university. i'd just like to add someone else wittingly responded to it by writing, 'wouldn't you have a serious shitting problem, not a fucking one?'

in other news, i need to go on a photo hunt taking pictures of all the corporate art, and the best konglish. i'll post it when i got it.

My Apartment...



this is my entrace.

this is basically my room, and all there is to it.


this is my kitchen which opposite my bed.

and this is the bathroom. look , the sink is in the shower. i now brush my teeth while i shower.

and this is just one little pic of my area. it's ridiculous big and packed full of everything. and i swear it's gonna take me the whole time i'm here just to discover all my neighbourhood.

The wonderful world of internet connections. Me and the internet have this fun game. I can’t get the internet in my apartment, but I can get it just sitting right outside the apartment.

Apartment pictures…

(gah, they'll come later... they're not load very good. that goes for all the other pictures too)

Oh right, guess what, it just snowed in Ilsan! It’s so beautiful, and so cold, and I don’t want to sit outside for too long.

I went for a walk the other day to find out where I could get an internet signal. I ended up sitting just outside a church at 7am. Finally when I was done internetting, I decided to go inside the church to check it out.

Church….

funny thing, I should’ve just went inside to begin with. It was comfortable and warm, and probably the biggest fanciest church I’ve ever seen. No joke. This thing had an escalator leading to the sanctuary that was probably 50-75metres. It had its own cafeteria, and a ton of other rooms that would’ve got me lost if I explored. It looked almost like an office building with a cross on top from the outside. I think the web address is www.bethel.co.ko I went to the 10am service. There is a headphone piece that you can pick up that has a translator speak into it. You go into the church and they show you where to sit, and pack you in good. I didn’t exactly like it, but then I realized why they needed to. The church gets completely filled. Every seat! There’s even people standing in a glass room at the back with their kids, and probably people sitting in the cafeteria listening to the sermon there too. I did a quick count/estimate and I think there is seating for at least 1500 people. It was ridiculous.

Bargain hunting…

After church I walked a LOT. I walked to Emart, which is the walmart equivalent I guess. I wanted to buy a printer, and the cheapest they had was 40,000 won. (conversion tip: think of that as $40.00 american) so I asked for that one, but they only had the display model. And then it was funny trying to arrange the sale when his English sucked, and my Korean is non-existant. He got the box out and everything, and was getting ready to sell it to me, but he kept trying to convince me that it wouldn’t be a good buy because the ink had been sitting too long, and maybe it would be frozen, and stuff like that. Eventually, I just decided not to get it. Then for the next 3 or 4 hours I walked around looking for a guitar store. I stopped and asked any western looking person I saw if they knew where one was, and finally I found one. John helped me out. I bought one from a couple that didn’t speak any English at all. And I inadvertently bartered for it. I got it for 95,000 won. And now I feel comfortable being here, because I have a guitar. Oh, and the other thing I found is a pizza hut right outside my apartment. And the only thing that was strange about my pizza was the potato wedges on it, which weren’t too bad. And it was only 5,000 won. So I think I might have pizza once or twice a week. It lasts 2 or 3 days anyway.

And those are my adventures so far. Oh, and the cross walks are really annoying. They leave pedestrians standing there for forever! And I’m not sure if this one dude was a really bad driver, or if they’re allowed to turn left on a red. And also, they have cross walks, but I don’t think drivers stop for them, so you kinda have to wait til it’s clear, and then run across.

The next blog I’ll make it a full fledged picture blog. Regretfully I don’t have pictures of strange Koreans because a) I don’t think I could ask to take pictures of them, and b) there aren’t really any strange Koreans. They all try to dress really nice. There isn’t even any grafitti anywhere. I did see a dog with it’s ears dyed blue though. And I saw the saddest looking homeless person. He was laying down on a rolling cart that was about 6 inches high, and he shuffled around with his arms on the ground. There are also plenty of military people around. I guess there’s a military base nearby. I’m in a city called Ilsan which happens to be right on the border between North and South Korea. I’m not too worried, I figure they wouldn’t want to bomb anywhere so close to them, it’d affect them too. Here’s something about ilsan, I haven’t actually read it: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ilsan

If it didn’t say it in that little write up, you should know that Seoul’s subway system is extended to Ilsan, however I was told that it’d take about an hour to get to downtown Seoul. So that’s that.

I walked around, and I wrote a list of things to comment on.

Mean girls…

I was told that because of the loose copyright laws they sometimes use some western images without care. For example, there was a blown up image from the cover of the movie ‘Mean Girls’ used out front of a strip club.

Smoking…

There are also no laws prohibiting smoking that I know of. So far I’ve only seen one restaurant with no smoking signs, and they had to draw them themselves. This is something that really really sucks. Although, interestingly girls generally don’t smoke in public. Someone told me that he once saw a girl have a cigarette ripped from her mouth by a strange because she was smoking in public.

Water…

Apparently I’m not supposed to drink the water.

Walking across the street…

I still haven’t figured out when I’m supposed to cross the street in some places. I guess I’ll just follow everyone else. But so far my impression is that Korean drivers are a little crazy, and traffic is ridiculous.

Singing…

Koreans love singing. I’ve seen at a couple different Koreans just singing outloud as they walked. And they don’t care if they’re out of tune.

there's too many of these personal 'expression' type of sites.
this one(blogspot)
livejournal
facebook(which can sound like facefuck if the wrong person is saying it)
myspace
msn space
youtube(if you're a video poster)
purevolume(which is strictly for music)
plentyoffish(for dating)
flickr

ugh

it's so hard to keep up with the trend on this stupid internet thing.

as a sidenote, i've realized that facebook is probably the best one for uploading images so far.

guess what! i rediscovered what my user name and password were for this blog. now i can actually write on it again.

i had a lot of fleeting thoughts that i intended to post before. but fleeting thoughts are rather fleeting. so now they're just relegated to that world that thoughts fill in their free time with while they wait to be discovered again.

i will say this, i just finished reading Maus. it's a quick read as most graphic novels are. and i don't think i've been affected like that by a book before. maybe i should read more.

Maus is a true story about nazi germany as retold by a jewish survivor that went through some of the worst of it. it is from the point of view of the comic artist interviewing his father, the survivor, about his experiences. the jews are drawn with mice heads, the germans with cat heads, the poles with pig heads, the one french guy had a frog head, and i saw a couple of british with fish heads, and some americans with dog heads.

A couple things really stuck in my head. One was a scene describing how the nazi's took jewish children often around 2 or 3 years old by the ankles and swung their heads into walls so they would cry no more. Another scene that really got me was the father describing how he got typhus. and many many others got it too. he would have to go to the bathroom all the time, and there would always be people lined up, and the halls were piled with the dead. he would slip his footsteps over the slick heads of the dead piled so high. and he would be sleeping next to the dead. and it was the absolute base of human existance just looking to survive when even stumbling over the dead becomes happenstance.
i want to do something, but i don't know what exactly. these events happened over 50 years ago, but there's still shit constantly going on. there's statistics like 33% of the world does not even have a clean source of water, and 50% is malnourished.

sorry, i didn't mean to be so heavy.

sometimes these things feel like holding onto nothing at all.
moments want your attention like newborns.
i am flying in jumbo jets while they cry themselves to sleep.
i am whatever you called me while i slept.
i wish i could remember my dreams.
i think i was holding you in one of them.
where do thoughts live in the offseason.
i'm forgetting everything, and i need to go to their vacation.

if you are going to be featured in a borat segment, here is what you should look for in a consent waiver...

i got a job in korea. now i can look forward to seeing these girls. not like that, i mean look at them... weird.

http://www.theseoultimes.com/ST/

Nielsen basically posits that 90% of the people who visit a social or community forum are lurkers, people who read what you've written, but never quite get sufficiently motivated to contribute a note, comment or email message. The remaining 10% are the contributors to your blog or discussion forum, and that further breaks down into 9% who are occasional contributors and 1% who are frequently contributors and typically account for the vast majority of your comments.

Specific to blogs, he suggests that the rule is better described as 95-5-0.1.

more: http://www.askdavetaylor.com/my_readers_participate_on_my_blog.html

uh oh

i'm a badass in my dreams. i don't get scared by what i should be. such as the time i embraced death from the nuke china sent to toronto. or that van that fell into the water. my latest is when i saw a guy walking down the street that symbolized to me someone that could take care of anything. he was not easy to scare. but he was scared this time of something. in that dream type of wordlessness he was able to convey to me what direction the thing was that he was afraid of. i decided i needed to find it, so i could kill it. why? i don't know. i guess it just seemed appropriate. and i think, but i'm not sure i met the thing, and it was one of those scary things without form, such as a demon wind. but i don't know. anyway, i don't get scared of these things for some reason.

this is a shirt i want.

a thousand things you can train yourself to do. it's like the man who was told he can have as much gold from the kings vault as he can carry on his person. so he loaded himself up so much that he only managed to take one step befor dropping all of it.

maybe that's just a fake reference to a fake story, but it still applies. i want to know everything. but my mind fumbles for the gold because i want too much. i sit not doing anything.

current list
-lots of english theory and criticism
-guitarness
-painterness
-a number of books i will forget
-comic script
-computer programming(for no particular reason)
-an ever increasing proficiency in everything!
-awesomeness
-finishing to do lists...

http://www.zefrank.com/scribbler/

i made this picture there. it turns any of your simple line art into looking cool.

the rest of ze frank's site is also amazing.

the rain it falls like waves that are like upside down m's mmmhmmm i lost your name in there only to find you again standing right behind me watching me the whole time
									i've figure it out now i'm living without a point of view so ominous maybe i'm feeling a little self-concious
									you caught up to me after i ran for miles you gave me a penny and said it meant everything and everything just got to my head i never spent a single cent again

i need to get these down before it's too late...

dream 1.

the first part related to my mom buying the house across the street. and it seemed it seemed it represented letting go of an accomplishment or something that was thought to be needed, because the next day she purposely walked to into the middle of the house even though she knew what was going to happen. the house collapsed around her. me and my brother rushed to her even though we knew she was ok and the exact spot she stood was the only safe place to be. then the dream switched to my family driving in a big van to visit a friend of my mothers. my dad was driving, and my mom was in the car, and i think my brother and my sister and her husband. although all of them were only there in that dream way of knowing they're there. then we also decided to stop and pick up homeless or needy people. we picked up a big native dude who seemed to be the guardian of this 9 year old boy we also picked up. their personalities we're really fleshed out. the boy said the man was nice except sometimes when he's on the phone he'll get really upset and bash the phone like this, and he demonstrated. the next person we picked up was a homeless 15 year old girl. i had to chase her down and bodily force her to the van, but they said that we can't force her in if she doesn't want to go. so we found a loophole and got her in, and put an infant in her arms, and she calmed down immediately. so we then started driving again to this friend's place. in the dream they lived in paris, ON on top of a big winding cliff. at one point the road was flooded out. so we decided we either need to speed through it so as to not get stuck, or go slow so we don't slide. we sped through, and we slid in slow motion to the edge. and we hung on that edge and i told everyone take off your seatbelts and open the side door. and we plunged into the lake the cliff was over. and i started trying to save everyone. the infant first of course. and then i was too awake to carry the dream on any further.

dream 2.

there are so many little pieces of it floating around in my head, but i don't remember how they line out. the only thing i really remember is that i was on the hamilton cliff scoping out hamilton and i see these guys swinging along roof gutters like monkeys. and they have cripples clinging to them. i was really impressed, so i went to explore where they came from. and it was an upper half of a house that provided charity for needy. and the only way in or out was in this awkward climb through roof tops. there was a girl there that explained it to me. the people that live downstairs don't like them leeching off the hydro and everything but they won't do anything about. and then i forget the numberous other facets of the dream.

dream 3.

i'm anxiously awaiting this dream. the previous 2 were quite detailed. it was better than tv.

http://sabas.jud.as/node/183

right click and download the songs.

i like 'song song song'

and tada, another one. jeff doesn't have a black eye. i just kinda messed up, and i don't care.

long time coming. now the pic is finally up. i never promised immediacy.

Spiders Chords by Lovedrug

CAPO 1

G
Searching on the wire
for a wire,
             Em
for a peace of mind,
                        C
like the spiders in the corners
             G
that are never there,

to the one,
            Em
to the magic sun.
                     C
you're not that bright now,
                        D
but you will be someday soon,
           C                         D
and you will fall in love with the moonlight.
G
So come on,
           Em
come on and say so,
G
come on,
          Em          C        D
come on and say so.
G
If god was on the radio
                   Em
i know he'd say to thee,
                       C
love is spiders on the edge,
                       G
and we're hanging by a thread,
                        Em
connected to the other end of this
                    C
twisted frequency i've spun,
            C
but i don't care,
      D
i'd be happy
         C
if you'd share
  D
your web with me.
G
So come on,
            Em
come on and say so,
G
come on,
          Em
come on and say so
G                   Em
come on, come on and say so

Break:
C        D

Em        G

C         D
                                 Em
Em         G...come on come on and say so


Repeat chorus (G and Em)

'an idea' by me

capo on 5
(D9: 054030)
Em ................... D9................. C
it feels so good to feel again. i'm tingling like blood rushing back into
Em................... D9 .............. C
my numb numb thoughts. uhuh oh uhuh oh uhuh
G ...F#/G ... C
.....................let me cry.
G ... F#/G ...C
.....................the tears are relief,
G ... F#/G... C
......................let them be
G ...F#/G ....C Em
......................understanding.
D
finally standing.
Em .......................................D9 .............................. C
finally leaving undercurrents to the streams that i would sit beside idle. i will walk a million
.............................................Em ....................D9...........................C
miles from where i began. to begin again, to reason that i am. to...

-chorus-
-bridge solo- mostly with D
-chorus-

Em ..................... D9 ........... C
finally let go of that point i got stuck on.
Em
it feels so good to feel again.

more coming soon. a grand opening, a grand facade, a grand face to face the music to. the song playing reminds me of christmas. it is nothing like christmas, but the strange associations we make make everything okay in our thinkings. smooth as apple sauce. smooth as anything blended enough i suppose. we can all become baby food to blend away those worries that a facade could never afford us. we need to get away from ourselves sometimes. who could we be apart from ourselves. reckless nights, and over stressed moments are distractions worth savouring. we need extremes like a pendulum to keep us swinging. if you come too close i might knock you with my arms flinging. you'll know how big my box can be when you know you bruise too easily. i'm sorry i don't mean that, and i promise if you catch me while i'm sleeping you can tie my arms down and get to know me on civil terms. maybe you'll find that without these flailing limbs i can be quite open once you dig in. on second thought, i might not tell you where i sleep. i'm afraid of the ropes you'll use to keep me in my seat.

pictures are fake. i never felt that way. did they feel that way? just wait until we forget this moment and are later reminded of it with paper false memories. reconstruct our bones into something beautiful. haven't we always wanted a pretty lie more than disenchantment. reenact my favorite stance. the last one read wrong, instead long drawn out poses. magazine froze. i'm natural as a gap commercial, now superseded by old navy. what will supersede me? a paper legacy? maybe i shouldn't be so old fashion, we're more emphemeral than that now. a laptop harddrive now holds my life. and some small places in imaginary space. although you still wonder how it can be small when it's imaginary. maybe physical size is still just an illusion, it's the ego that drives us. bruce lee was 5'7. an inch taller than me. i could be something of an inch short of a grand legacy of kicking ass and dying young. i'll try harder next time. or maybe i'll become old and look back at the photographs that paint the picture i thought they should.

these strange maneuvers, twisted, undo me. i've unloaded my gun now. i always thought it would be the worst part. it's rather watching the bullet hit that tears my heart. it moves so fast, it skips the skin, right past the skull to nestle in. between your frontal lobe and your motor skills, i'm sure because you froze still. but i wasn't much better for wear. wondering did i really pull the trigger. was i really there. i'm sure there's a term for it. delusions of war? your mouth is still working around words that aren't coming. my head is still trying to figure out why i need to hear anything at all. silence permeates like a warm breeze. could we forget our worries? could we please. bullet wounds and scattered brains let you forget little of the ever present circumstance. but maybe we can be good thesbians. play like this is normal. enjoy the moment.

Neuroscientists’ research is indicating that patients in a vegetative state may be fully aware of their surroundings, even though they are unable to communicate with individuals. A British-led research team undertook a study on a 23-year-old brain-damaged woman who has been in a “waking coma” since a car accident in July 2005.

The team first took 12 healthy individuals and recorded their brain functions while prompting them to imagine playing tennis, and then to imagine walking around their house. The researchers then asked the brain-damaged woman, who “shows no outward signs of awareness,” to imagine the same activities—playing tennis and walking around her house. Remarkably, the patient “showed strikingly similar patterns of brain activation to those of the healthy volunteers.”

Responding to critics who say the brain activity is just an automatic response to the word “tennis,” the researchers point out that the patient’s brain activity lasted around thirty seconds, and stopped when the researchers told her to “stop and rest”!

define yourself through what you aren't.
realize your breaking point.
achieve it.
touch your toes.
think about what you're thinking about.
after you're done running away, get down to business.
realize what your business is.
become functional.
if that fails, learn how to fake functionality well.
want something really bad.
become badly wanted.
turn this vicious circle to what you need.

every moment you are here it offsets another moment you are not there. every moment you are there offsets every moment you are not here. leaving that second sooner or that second later would mean you're not waiting for that light to change green. you could have missedthat car accident if you talked to him about that. you might have missed seeing that long lost friend if you didn't sleep in. etc.

a cathartic release.
some underlying psychological attachment that hair provides me. cutting it becomes an act of renewal. like the serpant and his skin.
i feel better now.

C...
i feel it too sometimes.
Q...
all you can do is stop thinking.
Q...
there is a difference between losing yourself and stopping yourself.
C...
can it?
Q...
in truth, I never think anymore.
Q...
no, i'm not afraid. What should I fear in it?
Q...
Yes I suppose I do fear that. But it is very reasonable to ignore that.
C...
We all make sacrifices.

rediscover myself. rework fireworks. readmit the admission that i'm missing from action. falsetto long note. moved by the chorus. disrobed animal wearing the channels of our brain flicking. don't flinch. don't move. don't speak like you mean it. disassociation relocates a compassion to the hidden seams. tucked in babysitter. here for the long haul. uncontested defensive questions wrecking my pensive letters. decent meat meant for someone other than me. busted out to break down. whole town spectacle. known for this moment. should have stayed wrung out. water frigid. forgot to swim. drowning. i'm...

potential is a shadow. it can never be reached. because potential is the ambiguity of always knowing you could always be better.

your eyes will have images beemed directly into them to create true 3-d. and also to incorporate 3-d images into your natural vision such as GPS arrows.
http://www.hitl.washington.edu/home/

there is a remote control car you can buy with a night vision camera attached to it that you can control and follow with a viewing screen next to your eye.

there is a whole fleet of cars right now that get 4 miles less per gallon than the original model T ford.


yay, technology magazines

the latest

the almost latest one.

what am i saying

'what if people got everything they expect, what becomes of hope, i bet she's a nervous wreck'

-7M3

Reclamation 2006

I'm taking back the following:
(note: everything i'm reclaiming is not exclusive to this list.)

from devil...
-my soul (it was a figure of speech)
from pretty girl...
-my heart (you have too many)
from Wesley Snipes...
-my shoes
from Wesley Willis...
-my guitar pick(i don't care if you're dead)
from Brian...
-my sandwish(kinda like a sandwhich)
from Shawna...
-my key(i'm still standing outside)
from Alison...
-my tastebuds(they may be small, but they're still important to me)
From Naomi...
-those 5 minutes
From Melissa...
-that nude painting of Elvis
From Joe...
-that one dance move...
From Josh...
-my film script about my life
From Doug...
-53 cents and half a timbit
from supersexysally...
-my e-mail address
From traffic...
-my patience
From Andria...
- my sense of direction
From Tia...
- my half chewed pen... and my good idea
From Brad...
- my ethnic status
From Noah...
-my rice krispies
From My mom...
-my placenta
From My dad...
-my manners
My sister...
- first dibs
From myself...
my life

Istvan Kantor and his cronies went to the AGO for the warhol exhibit. he splayed fake blood and did a crucifix pose, his cronies got naked on the floor and masturbated. the gallery was closed for 2 hours. Kantor was charged. that happened to not be the day i went to see andy. everything was very calm as typified by museums and $18 was far too much for this exhibit(or most any exhibit). Istvan Kantor and his cronies paid to get in. luckily i did not.

q: what's the next project you're working on?
Andy Warhola: Death

'Game? He was just trying to regain a little balance. But she saw a game, and that meant he could lose. Was likely to, since he had no idea what the game was. Why did women always make things so...complicated?'

-pg.193 of the book i'm reading

some people say that you should improve your weasal words... weasal words

'Would you like a shake of the rump rump to shake up thee ol' aids miss. Well I do say, jolly good show. More for both me and you miss, me and you.'

'i've never discovered the use for your name until now. and now i cannot get it out of my head .'

-Post Facto(1961)

inspired to draw people. i started here...

you're next...

'i didn't think it would turn out like this'
-The Other Guy(1984)

ever since that day that i changed my mind, i changed it again a million times. rewound and found i changed it again for fun. nothing mattered anymore than i thought it might have. and one decision leads to another and creates another to lead to the first. like a circular racetrack i remained ahead of the pack standing pat if i just thought hard enough.

i will do what i shouldn't to better understand what i should. and i will make lame excuses to excuse myself from what i could

my thoughts are rarely new rather they mostly inhabit rewording or rethinking old thoughts.